A Valentine’s Special by Dagmar Fleming
Do you ever feel like your love life is stuck on repeat, with the same characters auditioning for the lead role? It’s as if there’s a single casting call for roles in your love life drama, and only one type of actor keeps showing up, just in different costumes.
“…what if the answer to this big ‘why?’ behind our relational reruns lies within you?”
Each time you let go of a relationship, you hope for something different, yet you find yourself trapped in a cycle of romantic déjà vu. What keeps you stuck in this loop of shattered dreams, dashed hopes, and familiar heartache?
Many of us are quick to point fingers elsewhere when we’re grappling with the question, “Why?” Why does finding a guy who’s got his act together feel like chasing an elusive unicorn? Or a gal who’s got her own thing going on?
But what if the answer to this big ‘why?’ behind our relational reruns lies within you?
Before you dismiss the idea, hear me out, because there is a light at the end of the tunnel and I’m about to show you how to put the “oomph” back in your romance repertoire.
The Breakup Blues: Why You Keep Spinning the Same Old Record
It’s likely your past encounters ranged from unsavory to downright traumatic, prompting your brain to hit the “no more, please” button. That’s a natural protective mechanism. You would do anything to stop the replay button, wouldn’t you? Yet, in your quest to pause the history reruns, you inadvertently zoom in on the very attributes you wish to evade.
Ever noticed how desperately avoiding a mishap – like breaking a bone or a car accident – somehow draws it directly to you? It’s because our focus magnetizes our reality. Fixating on not inviting another schmuck into your life guarantees an encore. Afterall, the Universe has a knack for giving us more of what we dwell on.
Flipping the Script: Manifesting Mr./Ms. Right
If you crave something different, like a partner who’s the human equivalent of a cozy blanket and a five-star review, it’s time to switch up your mental playlist. Ditch the old tracks of “FailedExpectations” and “Massive Disappointments” and put on “The One That Got It All.” Crank up the volume on thoughts like, “I’m drawing in a partner who’s not only drop-dead gorgeous and brainy but also makes it feel like it’s a non-stop party.” Or maybe, “I’m on the verge of meeting a gal who’s got it all – brains, beauty, spirit – and thinks I’m a champ!” Spin this new record in your mind, and let the universe be your DJ, mixing up a love life that’s chart-topping good.
The Heartache Hangover: Letting Go of Yesterday’s Pain
So, what’s really keeping your would-be Mr. Prince or Ms. Princess off your love arena? It’s a sneaky little gremlin I call “validation.”
Rewinding and replaying that last breakup or heartache isn’t exactly anyone’s idea of a hit replay button. It was like a bad movie: disappointing, unpleasant, hurtful, and an all-you-can-eat buffet of negative emotions. Can I have some fries with that?
This kind of experience can be summed up in a couple of words…
You probably wonder: if you kick the memory of your ex to the curb, does it mean the hurt they caused gets the boot, too? Does letting go mean you’re tossing out the tears, the insomnia-infused nights, and yes, those therapeutic pints of ice cream that boosted the global dairy market? Because, truth be told, while they might have momentarily shrunk your heartache, they did wonders for expanding your waistline – and not much else. How do you find someone that doesn’t leave you reaching for the freezer?
Pause for a second and mull this over…
What’s this wallowing actually netting you? A spot in the Pain and Suffering Hall of Fame? Picture this slightly macabre scenario: there you are, horizontal in the pine box, and as the roses come raining down, someone leans in and says, “Wow, this one could’ve won an Oscar for the drama! Cry me a river.” Wouldn’t you rather be the legend who turned life’s lemons into the best darn lemonade on the block? Sure, you waded through some muck, but you didn’t just sit there – you pulled on the boots, got to steppin’, and left that mess behind.
So, what’s your script going to read? Because it’s time to cast yourself in the “Love Story” that feels like a box office hit, not a tear-jerker like “The Notebook” you’d rather forget.
Ditch the legacy of suffering and some calories with it.
Building a New Castle: Moving On From Yesterday’s Woes
Oh, the love tales we spin in the theater of our minds. You’ve crafted this blockbuster romance with your ex, complete with sunset horseback rides, intertwined fingers, gourmet dinners under the stars, and a future family that even had a pet namedafter your grandma. You’ve built a dreamy castle in the clouds, one so perfect that no mere mortal could hope to live up to it. “But it was all going to come true,” you protest.
Let me lay it down for you: sure, it could have happened – just like I could win the lottery tomorrow. But here we are, you in your tears, and me FedExing a reality check. Clinging to this fantasy isn’t just futile; it’s like trying to renovate a crumbling shack on a prime piece of real estate. Do you know how much it costs?!
Here’s a thought: why not bring in the bulldozers and start fresh? Demolish that old, haunted mansion of memories and lay the foundations for a new, grandiose abode for you and Mr. Hunk or your Ms. Dreamgirl. Imagine designing this place from scratch – modern, sturdy, and just your style. And while you’re at it, throw in a cat or two, just because you can.
Keep the creativity flowing. Think of it as building a castlewhere the next chapter of your love story awaits.
Dialing up Cupid’s Love
Remember, with nearly even odds between men and women on this planet, the world is ripe with opportunities for love. Why settle for yesterday’s leftovers when there’s a menu of potential matches waiting to be explored? In this day and age, when even Uber can drop a gourmet meal daily at your doorstep, finding someone new to share your revamped castle with is just a phone call away. This Valentine’s Day, dial the Universe and place your order.
Cupid’s arrow is poised, ready to strike. Are you? What’s on the menu?
About Dagmar Fleming
Dagmar Fleming is the Founder of Unlock Your Success and the Athena Circle. As a success coach, best-selling author, and intuitive healer, Dagmar blends her expertise in global business management with powerful energy healing practices, and she empowers leaders through her innovative Triple Quantum Reset™ modality, enabling them to surpass unconscious mental and emotional barriers and unlock their innate potential. Fueled by her passion for empowering women, she established The Athena Circle, an organization dedicated to fostering growth, purpose alignment, and holistic success.